How Soon Is 2 Soon 2 Come Out At Work???

2 the LGBT community.....we've all been through it b4. You go on an interview, you get hired 4 the job, after being there 4 awhile you make a few friends....AND THEN....the personal questions begin. "So where do you live? Do you have any kids? I see your wearing a ring, are you married?"

Then when you admit 2 being in a relationship, you start paying close attention 2 how you mention your partner by using mutual words. Like instead of saying my (girl, wife, boyfriend, husband he or she), you might say my fiance or my spouse, this way the co-worker can't tell what the sex of your partner is. And if your co-worker calls your house and your partner answers the phone, you might take it as far as saying, "Oh that was my (friend, sister or brother) that answered." It can really get ridiculous!

These are the things that gay and lesbian people have 2 go through on the job, 4 fear that if found out, the nice treatment from co-workers might end. Even if you feel that you've known a co-worker 4 a few months and feel comfortable enough 2 let them know your personal background, it's still a risk 2 take when you completely open up. But I feel if you've made a connection with a co-worker over a period of time, and you decide 2 let them in 2 your personal life (which is a privilege), if they turn their backs on you then they weren't being genuine from the start. They were being BIG FAT phonies! So you shouldn't feel bad at all, it's them that should feel bad 4 being prejudice and discriminatory.

Trust me guys! I've been in this situation more then a few times, and have even gotten fired over being totally open. But every 1 handles things differently. 4 me I'm always totally honest and open, because I could personally care less what others think of my lifestyle. I'm going 2 be me regardless, and if you miss out on it then that's your problem not mine. I'm also married so when a person notices my rings and say "your husband," I quickly correct them because if I didn't, it would be like disrespecting my wife. After enduring the shocked looks on their faces, and getting the usual comment of, "I so didn't get gay from you," I laugh and move on with my day. I feel people respect you more when you're honest (I know I do), and the fact that I am so direct seems 2 throw people 4 a loop. But then they usually come back around after adjusting 2 the new facts of my life.

So I say all this 2 say, there is never a good time or bad time 2 be honest. All you can do is be real with yourself and others, and hope 4 the best in all situations. And remember that everything happens 4 a reason, so if you're fired from a job 4 being honest, then it was probably not safe 4 you 2 be in that environment any longer anyway. And if you lose a friend over being honest, then they weren't a friend 2 begin with. You're better then that and stronger then that. So keep your head up knowing your a good person with a good heart, and someday, somewhere, somebody will recognize it!

Peace Be With You Always!!!!

Clay Aiken Whines & Adam Lambert Takes The Shine!

So now, Clay Aiken (above) is sorry 4 saying that "American Idol" runner-up Adam Lambert's singing made his "ears bleed" on his blog. So what's really up with Clay Aiken's rants? Yes, Adam's style is more rock 'n' roll then anything, but he's been a huge hit on American Idol because of his style. So could that be a hint of jealousy I'm hearing? Is Clay scared his gay limelight will be stolen from him? I happened 2 like Adam's style and I must say I was thoroughly impressed with his vocals, and this is coming from a person that is an R&B regular.

It also pissed me off that people were making comments, about Adam possibly not winning because he might be gay. SO WHAT! What does his sexual orientation have 2 do with his talent?! Even Elisabeth Hasselbeck from the daytime talk show "The View", commented that Adam (pictured right) won't win because he doesn't appeal 2 the majority of Americans. EXCUSE ME! Obviously he did appeal 2 the majority of Americans, because he made it all the way 2 the final finals. And he may have lost American Idol, but he's still a winner because you know he's getting a record deal. And if doesn't it's because he's gay which is ridiculous! Talent has no color, race, sexual orientation....it's just talent. This is why gay artists can't get record deals now, because people are prejudice and hateful.

Moreover, you'd be surprised how many gay artists there are in the entertainment industry, they just choose not 2 come out thinking they'll be judged 4 that faster then their talent......and can you blame them? It's reminds me of the "Don't ask, don't tell" policy in the military which needs 2 be reformed immediately. The gay entertainment industry is the largest untapped resource, because people choose 2 be judgemental and evil. Little do they know, if we could all learn 2 work 2gether and stop the division, there could be lots of money made. Maybe 1 day people will use common sense, but until that day, LGBT people will keep representing and standing tall proving we have what it takes, time and time again.

Copyright ©2009 LA

Sex and the City Actress Cynthia Nixon 2 Wed Girlfriend!

Sex and the City actress Cynthia Nixon is set 2 marry longtime girlfriend Christine Marinoni. The actress caused controversy when she left the father of her 2 children, English professor Danny Moyes, 4 a woman, activist Christine Marinoni. Cynthia revealed: “If it becomes legal I think we would. It’s something my girlfriend is interested in and it was not something my boyfriend ever was. I think that to get married to her would be a little act of rebellion. It’s like if you’ve never had the vote and then you get it you’re going to run out there and vote. I always avoided marriage in the past and was always very wary of it. I felt like it was potentially a trap. People sometimes want the party, the gifts and the public celebration of this big love - they’re excited about that rather than about the lifetime commitment. So I always steered clear of it.”

She added: “I started dating my girlfriend in January 2004 and the press got wind of it around the September. There was a lot of attention and it was crazy. I said I was romantically involved with a woman, but I wasn’t going to talk about it until everybody calmed down. I never felt like there was an unconscious part of me that woke up or came out of the closet. There wasn’t a struggle or an attempt to suppress. I met this woman and I fell in love with her. In terms of my sexual orientation, I don’t really feel that I changed. I don’t feel any different than I did before. I don’t feel like there was some hidden part of myself that I wasn’t aware of. I had been with men all my life and I had never met a woman I had fallen in love with before. But when I did, it didn’t seem so strange. I don’t define myself. I’m just a woman in love with another woman.”

And something 2 get excited about ladies! There will be a sequel 2 the Sex and the City movie, due out next Spring!!! WhooHoooooo!!!! Love you Cynthia and I wish you and your fiancee all the happiness in the world.

Copyright ©2009 LA

Should Discriminatory States Be Boycotted?

A quick thought in light of the Prop 8 situation. It's interesting how the discriminatory states who refuse 2 award same-sex couples equal rights, have no problem having same-sex loving people spend their hard earned cash within the state, in order 2 keep the economy going strong. And they sure don't mind having LGBT people work hard at their jobs in order 2 keep the state businesses afloat, but they have a problem with treating us fairly? We contribute 2 this country and the world just as much as anybody else, but yet we're treated like outcast/aliens from another planet.

So I see it this way. Maybe it would be easier 4 all LGBT people 2 move their place of residence, 2 the states that are 4 marriage equality. In a sense it would be like boycotting the discriminatory states, because by moving we would be taking with us a large amount of state revenue. And when the states choose 2 get their acts 2gether, then maybe we'll choose 2 move back. The message is clear, "You need us, so stop acting like you don't." And because we are needed, we should be treated equal as every 1 else.....period.

What are your thoughts about this?

Copyright ©2009 LA

Take A Stand Against Prop 8!

As you all know, the Supreme Court of California pushed 4 Prop 8 2 be upheld this past Tuesday. So basically they feel they have the right 2 tell people who's fit 2 be married and who is not. The couples that did legally marry are still married, but no new marriages are being recognized. But how is it that they think it's fair 2 allow some the rights and not other's, as if certain people just made the quota or something? Like oh well.....if you weren't married b4 Prop 8 was upheld, your just assed out. Somehow, someway they have 2 know that this isn't right. It doesn't even sound right.

This is why tomorrow in Fresno California, 1000's of people organized by more than 100 organizations, are coming 2gether in a major event unlike any other in the post-Prop 8 era. It's called "Meet in the Middle for Equality" and it's going 2 be historic. This will be a moment you don't want to miss -- an unforgettable event in the history of the movement 4 equal rights. This isn't just about California. It's about America. This isn't just about marriage. It's about human rights.

If you're going 2 be in the Fresno area, come out and show your support 4 marriage equality. 4 more information on the locations and times click below: http://www.couragecampaign.org/MeetInTheMiddle

Maine Makes 5th State 2 Legalize Gay Marriage!

Governor John Baldacci of Maine, signed Wednesday in 2 law a bill legalizing gay marriage in the state. The move makes Maine the 5th state 2 allow gay marriage. The other states that have already followed suit are: Iowa, Vermont, Massachusetts and D.C.

California as you know was on the map, until a few naysayers decided 2 engage 'Prop 8' and reverse the law. Currently, many activists are working 2 ban 'Prop 8' and allow 4 marriage equality in California once again. When Cali passed the gay marriage law, I wrote an article stating that the law was only passed, so the state can make money and dig itself out of a debt hole. California lawmakers knew that gay marriage would have generated mass revenue from many wedding celebrations, and I urged folks 2 not spend a dime just yet. Unfortunately, Cali gained that mass revenue and in the end gay marriage was revoked, killing the dreams of many loving couples.

Up next 4 the marriage equality challenge! New Jersey & New York!! Let the fight begin! Round 1.....DING!

Copyright ©2009 LA

LA's Thoughts 2 Miss California's Same-Sex Marriage Answer

Miss North Carolina Kristen Dalton, may have been crowned Miss USA 2009 on Sunday, but on Monday, it was Miss California Carrie Prejean's answer 2 a question about same-sex marriage from celebrity blogger and pageant judge Perez Hilton, that was the night's biggest story.

During the show, Perez asked Carrie, "Vermont recently became the fourth state to legalize same sex marriage. Do you think every state should follow suit? Why or why not?"

"Well I think it's great that Americans are able to choose one or the other. Um, we live in a land that you can choose same sex marriage or opposite marriage and, you know what, in my country and in, in my family, I think that I believe that a marriage should be between a man and a woman," Carrie said to a mix of boos and applause. "No offense to anybody out there. But that's how I was raised and that's how I think that it should be between a man and a woman."

Carrie's answer 2 the hot button question cost her the crown, at least according 2 Perez.

Personally, I feel that Miss California is very much entitled 2 her own opinion. However, I felt that she could have answered the question differently, and I most certainly was taken aback that she felt gays and lesbians shouldn't be given the same equal rights as heterosexual couples. And same-sex marriage isn't opposite of heterosexual marriage. Marriage is marriage.....period. Marriage is 2 people building a life 2gether, connecting, growing and living united as 1. And all people are deserving of equal rights no matter the race, creed, color or gender. The same way all people came 2gether 4 the common purpose of voting 4 President Obama, even though some folks were discriminated against and had 2 fight 4 the right 2 vote, is the same way that all people should have the equal rights of marriage. I happen 2 think equality is worth fighting 4.

And who's 2 say that Miss California would have won the crown if she did answer differently? Obviously, Miss North Carolina was the better candidate because she won.

Just my thoughts......

Copyright ©2009 LA